Wednesday, August 3, 2011

I Don't Feel Like Writing

I am a slacker. I have to admit that. I have posted diligently to my blog for about three weeks now, and going over it, I have noticed some things are not consistent. 

Like a few times I posted some continuing stories. As of now, I have three open ones. My original intent was to publish these kind of stories on a weekly basis, say every Monday, and continue each Monday thereafter. I was then to take each other day of the week and use them for a specific theme. I haven't really done what I have planned.
Some of it is due to time management. That is why, if you noticed, I try keep my blogs between 500-600 words. I have many writing projects going on at the same time. My book, which is the first draft stage, is written at a pace of  1500 -2000 words a day. My screenplay, which I just finished the outline, gets about an hour a day of my time. Then there is the stuff I actually do to get paid.

The writing I get paid to do does not amount to much, so I have to supplement this income with non- writing endeavors. This encompasses pretty much anything, from fixing a lonely widow's leaky roof to helping someone roll over his retirement fund, and anything in between. These help in paying the bills.

Then there is the issue of my children. They don't live with me, which, in itself, is a double - edged sword. On one side, I have more free time to write, but on the other side, I usually take this time and spend it with them. It is this quality time that help us bond, and some of the things we experience would make some good stories. Some of them would even be funny. I may even write them someday.

Then, of course, there are days I don't feel like writing. Which, to be perfectly honest, is every day. There are no other extenuating circumstances which interfere with me actually writing, I am just being lazy. The difference between the days I do write to the days I don't write is how I overcome procrastination and my apprehension to my own work. I always look at it with an objectivity that borders on unfairness to myself. I always think my writing is mediocre, and it may truly be that, but I think of those people who actually read and enjoy it.  I know is it only a few, but, to me, if one person gets something worthwhile out of it, then I am happy that I made a small contribution to this world.

I don't about other writers, but I find writing to be hard work. It is no easier for me to write something than it is for someone else who is not a writer. There are countless times I look at a blinking icon on the computer screen, or a blank piece of paper (I do it both ways for different reasons) and be lost on what to put down for hours on end..  When I do come up with something, I notice how much it sucks, erase it (or throw it in the trash) and start the vicious circle all over again.  

So here are my excuses for not writing. I promised my late friend I would give a my best effort,  and if he was with us today, he would say how these reasons are lame, and he would tell me just stop whining and get it done.

Though he never had writing as a bitch, I have to say, he is... he is rrrr.... he is right.

What about you, what is your excuse not to do what you must do?

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